I have a lot of thoughts entering my head today. I had a bunch of weird dreams the past few days. Saw images of my dead sister, parental conflict and all of this set to the backdrop of Law & Order: SVU characters with a laugh track. I took it, like Ebenezer Scrooge, as some fatty byproduct messing with my body. This morning I got a call from my mother that my father was in the hospital.

My family, though I never would have guessed when I was younger, loves to have secrets. When I went into the hospital a few years ago my mother never told my father I did. This little fact may play into what just happened but I’ll explain it a bit later. My Mom has money socked away all over the place, money my father doesn’t know the location of. There’s a number of other things which I just don’t want to discuss, but I guess it’s something that happens with a lot of families I just had this idyllic idea of how my family was that has been shattered.

My father has been in the hospital 3 times in 2 months. Considering his age it’s a little bit of a concern. I had strange calls with the both of them just a week ago, with the last hospital scare. My mom called and told me they had taken Dad home from the hospital (didn’t even know he was in) and that he was definitely diagnosed with diabetes. She then hits me with she never told my Dad I have it and it’s up to me if I want to tell him but keep her name out of it. OK, so hit me with that pressure.

Then I talk to Dad. He tells me about hospital and slip by in passing he might have some diabetic concerns. Hmmm, exactly what I said almost 2 years ago when doctors told me the initial diagnosis was ‘wrong.’ He didn’t mention he was in the hospital earlier or that it was kind of serious. Now he’s back in and in talking to my Mom her words said it was no big deal but her voice said this seems to be not good and she’s scared.
Now I’m at the apartment feeling like I’ve been kicked in the teeth. I haven’t told my Dad of my diagnosis and I’m not sure if that would open him up. I feel bad I didn’t tell my Dad, but now I feel I’m in a bind because my Mother knew and didn’t say a word. It’s just the way my parents are; communication isn’t a strong point.

I’ve been in a daze the past few hours. I don’t know how bad my Dad is because Mom wants to protect me. I feel helpless and exposed way out here.

 

<< PREVIOUS
NEXT >>

Copyright © Chaotic Fringe LLC. All rights reserved.

Feel Like A Depeche Mode Song - January 05, 2010
Home | News | Entertainment | Blog | Podcast | IMVN | Everquest 2 | Links | Photos | V-Blog